Everyone has had disagreements with their loved ones, but that doesn't mean it's the end of the road or the end of the relationship. People have different opinions and it is completely normal and normal to disagree with the people you love, even your partner.
Although conflict is a normal part of life, there are less common ideas about dealing with conflict in a healthy way.
"When disagreements arise, it's important to remember that the issue is between you and your partner, not you against your partner," says Tracy Lickfelt, vice president of outpatient and engagement services at Centerstone.
No two couples are the same, but the most common areas where they disagree are finances, parenting style, communication issues and spending time together. These are common everyday conflicts, but it is very difficult to deal with them in a healthy way.
"Unhealthy conflicts can include blaming, making assumptions, discussing past issues, name-calling, controlling the outcome or avoiding the conversation altogether," says Lickfelt.
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Here are some healthy habits to use when you and your partner disagree:
• Accept feelings. It is very important to listen to your partner and accept his point of view. Use "I" statements to express your feelings without blaming the other person for what you are thinking and feeling.
• Check your partner. It is important to remind your partner that disagreements do not define your relationship. Make sure you are with your partner and that it is okay to have different opinions in your relationship.
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• take a break. If the conversation gets heated or you find it very difficult to communicate with your partner, try to take a moment. Try not to use this as an avoidance tactic, but make sure you return to the conversation when you've had time to think and catch your breath.
• In the middle of the meeting. "Communication can be an important tool for conflict resolution in a healthy relationship. Both partners get what they want and learn to work together to make it happen," says Lickfelt. "When a partner gets what they want, it can be healthy."
• Reflect together. During or after your disagreement, take time to be with your partner and reflect on the conversations you had. Discuss what worked well and what didn't. Pay attention to the features and patterns you can improve. Say something like, "I feel like I know you." i will work
• Ask for help. If you find that you are stuck with your spouse and cannot overcome the problems, you can always go for couples counseling. Sometimes it can be helpful to discuss the situation with a professional to find other coping and communication skills in your relationship.
Partners who learn to communicate in a healthy way are more likely to find healthy ways to get along with each other. Remember that these techniques take time to develop, so don't get discouraged.
If you or someone you know needs healthy communication skills, Centerstone can help. Call 1-877-HOPE123 for more information.
Tracy Lickfelt is Centerstone's mental health consultant and vice president of outpatient and engagement services.
This article originally appeared in The Nashville Tennessean: Six healthy ways to resolve conflict with your partner.